Fat Dude Digs Flicks

The day is finally here. In the grand scheme of things, a good number of movie fans say the Oscars don’t matter. In a sense, it’s true. A group primarily made up of old, stodgy, white men get together and vote on what was the best in film of the previous year. Many years, they get it wrong (I’m looking at you SHAKESPEARE IN LOVE, CRASH, and that one movie about the stuttering monarch, to name a few), but others this collective group has their fingers directly on the pulse of what matters in the world of film (THE GODFATHER, NO COUNTRY FOR OLD MEN, and THE HURT LOCKER, among others). What movie from this year’s crop will stand the test of time and be regarded as a cinema classic in the future? One could look at the nominees and come to the conclusion that maybe none of them could. Maybe this year, we’ll remember DRIVE and BRIDESMAIDS and the conclusion to HARRY POTTER over everything else. But, maybe not. Other people ask how one work of art can be judged as better than another. This happens in all mediums. Why should film be any different. Like it or not, carrying the title of Academy Award winner puts you or your film at the top of the heap and demands even just an extra hint of respect. This year, 62 films have been nominated for Oscars. Of those 62, only a handful will walk away as winners. Here’s a look at what one critic — myself — thinks will take the prizes.

Best Picture:
Let’s start with the one that matters the most, shall we? First, what won’t win? Some movies truly need to consider it an honor to be nominated. In a year with many other deserving options, three definitely need to consider the fact that they made the cut win enough. There is no way that EXTREMELY LOUD AND INCREDIBLY CLOSE, THE TREE OF LIFE, or WAR HORSE will walk away with the trophy. How LOUD made the cut is still shocking. TREE OF LIFE is a polarizing piece of experimentation. It uses the medium as art, but lacks any kind of cohesive narrative. Oh, and it has dinosaurs for some reason. And Sean Penn. WAR HORSE is a respectable throwback to an age of sentimental films with two masters at the helm: John Williams’s emotional score and Steven Spielberg’s directing. It’s a good movie, but not the best. Not this year.

Take those three out of the equation and you have, honestly, a pretty even match with the six remaining: THE ARTIST, THE DESCENDANTS, THE HELP, HUGO, MIDNIGHT IN PARIS, and MONEYBALL. MIDNIGHT has a solid script and is one of Woody Allen’s best in a long time. But it is Woody Allen and that turns a lot of people off. THE HELP has its fair share of warranted controversy, but the pitch-perfect performances across the board and being the highest grossing nominee make this the fan favorite. HUGO has the unjust stigma of being a children’s film, but also boasts the year’s best use of 3D and is a love letter the early days of cinema magic. MONEYBALL is yet another smart Aaron Sorkin script. It’s a baseball movie, but deals with so much more. In reality, the race comes down between THE DESCENDANTS and THE ARTIST. At this point, it is looking like THE ARTIST is a sure thing. Deservedly so. A lot of flack is heading the film’s way saying that if it wasn’t a silent film, no one would care. This can be said of any of the movies. Who would care about any of the movies nominated if they weren’t exactly what they were? THE ARTIST delivers an entertaining throwback to a different era, utilizing everyone involved’s skill in all areas. We get so much over-processed garbage in theaters these days filled with effects, thin plots, weak dialogue, stiff acting, that I see no problem in rewarding a simple, beautiful, black and white, expertly crafted, heartwarming film.

WINNER: THE ARTIST

Best Actor:
If by some miracle, the Academy decides to reward Gary Oldman for his magnificent career, I doubt you’d see any disappointment in the building. However, by winning virtually every prize that has come before, Jean Dujardin has nearly cemented his place in Oscar history.

WINNER: Jean Dujardin, THE ARTIST

Best Actress:
Few performances stuck in my brain like Rooney Mara’s did in THE GIRL WITH THE DRAGON TATTOO, but she’s going to have to accept just a nomination this year.  This is a two-way race and has been from the get go. Do you reward the legend whose brilliant impression breathes a little bit of life into an awful film or the expert who captivated the world with her talent and makes a good movie worthy of a best picture nominee. Seventeen nominations be damned, this year really belongs to Viola.

WINNER: Viola Davis, THE HELP

Best Supporting Actor:
This is really a battle between two screen legends in their 80s: Christopher Plummer and Max Von Sydow. Having swept everything else, Plummer not winning would be the biggest shock of the night.

WINNER: Christopher Plummer, BEGINNERS

Best Supporting Actress:
As cool as it would be to see Melissa McCarthy win an Oscar, the Academy already has Octavia Spencer’s name carved on her award.

WINNER: Octavia Spencer, THE HELP

Best Director:
Hate to say that this is a sure, thing, but it seems like it is. Your chance of an upset here would come from a Scorsese win for HUGO, but with a DGA win, Hazanavicius has it in the bag.

WINNER: Michel Hazanavicius, THE ARTIST

Original Screenplay:
WINNER: Woody Allen, MIDNIGHT IN PARIS

Adapted Screenplay:
WINNER: Nat Faxon, Jim Rash, and Alexander Payne, THE DESCENDANTS

Best Animated Feature:
I don’t know if I will ever understand what made RANGO so appealing to everyone. This was a pretty lackluster year for CG-animated films, but absolutely sparkled with three great hand-drawn gems, two of which are nominated here. RANGO will win, but I promise an excessive celebration the likes of which never seen before should the beautifully breathtaking and spellbinding CHICO AND RITA take home the gold. You pick RANGO, but even if I lose the category by picking CHICO on my personal ballot, I’ll lose happily.

WINNER: RANGO

Best Foreign Language Film:
If anything were to stop the monstrous success of Iran’s A SEPARATION, it would likely be Israel’s FOOTNOTE. That said, don’t count on it.

WINNER: A SEPARATION

Best Original Score:
WINNER: Ludovic Bource, THE ARTIST

Best Original Song:
Wrong song, right movie.

WINNER: “Man or Muppet,” THE MUPPETS

Best Art Direction:
As we work through most of the technical categories, expect minimal commentary. These are where things get tough. Sometimes, it is best to count on something nominated for best picture, unless you run into a fantasy film. Art direction, though, really comes down to a battle between HUGO and HARRY POTTER.

WINNER: HARRY POTTER AND THE DEATHLY HALLOWS PART TWO

Best Cinematography:
Beautiful black and white or the only thing I appreciated about a bloated piece of arthouse cinema? An ASC guild win means…

WINNER: THE TREE OF LIFE

Best Documentary Feature:
I really wish I could have seen the crowd-pleasing UNDEFEATED. Being a huge fan of Friday Night Lights, I probably would love it. Two of the four I did see, however, are pretty fantastic. A truly “successful” documentary is able to spark some kind of social change; get people motivated to act. Helping the West Memphis Three finally find their freedom, PARADISE LOST 3 did just that.

WINNER: PARADISE LOST 3: PURGATORY

Best Documentary Short:
Didn’t see any of these. If they choose to go against type, the Academy could select the FUN and UPLIFTING “God Is The Bigger Elvis.” Look, though, for a more somber choice, as per usual.

WINNER: SAVING FACE

Best Animated Short Film:
Pixar missed out on the feature film category this year by releasing the sub-sub-par CARS 2, but their short film, LA LUNA, is pretty good. Look, though, for a short created by former Pixar animators to win big here.

WINNER: THE FANTASTIC FLYING BOOKS OF MR. MORRIS LESSMORE

Best Live Action Short Film:
The American entry TIME FREAK is just plain fun and inventive. It has the easygoing, do-it-yourself nature that last year’s winner GOD OF LOVE had. However, the hilariously moving entry from Norway really should take the prize.

WINNER: TUBA ATLANTIC

Best Costume Design:
WINNER: Sandy Powell, HUGO

Best Editing:
Typically goes hand in hand with best picture, THE ARTIST will probably win. MONEYBALL has a chance here, though, as a means of spreading the wealth.

WINNER: THE ARTIST

Best Make-Up:
Unimpressive nominees make HARRY POTTER a near-lock.

WINNER: Nick Dudman, Amanda Knight and Lisa Tomblin, HARRY POTTER AND THE DEATHLY HALLOWS PART TWO

Best Sound Editing:
I would like to think that the powers that be would allow DRIVE to win something. HUGO is also nominated and may be more likely, but my heart is beating for DRIVE.
WINNER: Lon Bender and Victor Ray Ennis, DRIVE

Best Sound Mixing:
WINNER: Tom Fleischman and John Midgley, HUGO

Best Visual Effects:
Andy Serkis didn’t get a nod. RISE OF THE PLANET OF THE APES will get a win.

WINNER: Joe Letteri, Dan Lemmon, R. Christopher White and Daniel Barrett, RISE OF THE PLANET OF THE APES

Here’s hoping the best movies win!